Sunday, January 23, 2011

Growing Pains

Hi friends!  This will be my last post for a few days at least.  I have come to realize that this computer screen, though it is my connection to so many, is also a HUGE drain on my time.  I have a few goals that must be accomplished ASAP and have decided to turn off the computer until they are completed.  But before I go I just wanted to babble a bit.

This morning I was in such a dreadful mood.  I woke to a monster fever blister which is a direct result of not getting enough rest.  Luckily my sweet 8 year old climbed in the bed and snuggled the grump right out of me.  It is an awesome thing to love and be loved.  Sometimes I think of my life and the many people involved in it and wonder if I moved away who would truly miss me.  No this is not a pity party blog, it's just me thinking of who really matters, who really loves me.  A few weeks ago I called my mother and one of my best friends in tears because I realized someone "unfriended" me on Face book.  I must also say I had a pretty raging case of PMS which was a contributing factor to this unrationalization.  Well this so called friend was someone I went to high school with and truth be told I wasn't friends with her in high school and had no contact with her until I discovered FB, so......what's the point. 

This Christmas I made a decision to stop going places and spending time with people that I do not genuinely like.  That doesn't mean we have to think alike, as a matter of fact I prefer that we don't.  I really love being challenged, a little healthy debate is a wonderful thing.  It is the people that disagree with me that have caused the most growth in my life.  I come from a family that doesn't disagree very often and in a way that is wonderful because I don't have to worry too much about them raging over me getting a tattoo or my nose pierced.  Also I have no doubt that they genuinely love me.  But I need to be challenged, it's just who I am.  I need you to tell me why you think the way you do even if I think it is utterly ridiculous just so I can examine the way I think and be sure I know why I think the way I do.

Religion has always been a subject that I have practically ran from, so afraid that if I understood something besides Christianity that it may cause doubt.  Oh  my gosh how completely pathetic is that.  I have decided I want to know, I want to understand.  Why?  Because I really believe that to grow in my own faith I have to understand yours.  I have to question mine.  I have to doubt it.  Not because I am interested in changing but because I am interested in growing.

Wow, and babble I have done.  I guess now I must get to work.  Love and blessings!

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